The difference between energy givers and takers

The difference between energy givers and energy takers

According to CNBC contributor Suzy Welch, there are two types of people in the world: energy givers, and energy takers.

Energy givers are normally positive, solutions-oriented, and they generally leave you feeling invigorated. Energy takers, on the other hand, are filled with negativity, they can be needy, and they tend to suck all the oxygen out of a room.

Reflecting on negative energies

You may think that it is obviously best to be an energy giver, rather than an energy taker. Sure. Yes, we want to show up as energy givers, but it is important to consider and understand the following:

  • We will never be perfect — we all go through a range of emotions in our lives, positive and negative.
  • Negative feelings and stress can be powerful movers of our energy.
  • Many aspects of life are simply outside of our control. We, therefore, cannot filter our lives perfectly to block the stress and negativity.
  • Recognize that sometimes we need to lean on others for support and energy.


According to the law of rhythm, the downs are inevitable, but we must show up as best we can. It’s kind of like surfing.


♬ Surfing - Dvrryl2Times

How to become an energy giver

Despite the ebbs and flows of life, we can become proficient, or at least better, at managing our energies. Here are a few ideas on how to do that.

  • Become aware of the energy givers and takers in your life. They can be different from person to person. For example, losing a job may drain and depress one person, but that same experience may encourage and motivate someone else to get an even better job.
  • Make shifts in your life to allow for more light, love, and energy. This could mean getting out of your comfort zone.
  • Reflect on the times when you last felt energized, your heart felt full, and you were happy and smiling. Those are your energy givers – replicate those feelings as often as possible.
  • Reflect on the things that “fill your cup”. These could be big things like taking a vacation or even small things, like that first cup of coffee in the morning, a smile on your child’s face, a relationship you are grateful for, etc. 
  • Be cognizant about the things that cause you to feel unhappy, heavy, stressed, anxious, and unfulfilled. These are your energy takers. Avoid them whenever possible.


Journaling is a good way to help you reflect on what is good or not in your life. 

Energy givers vs energy takers

Common energy suckers

Once again, it is important to understand that energy can be different from person to person. For example, screens are generally considered energy suckers, but they can also be energy givers if you are using them in a positive way.

  1. Inconsistent sleep
  2. Unclear boundaries
  3. Junk food
  4. Negativity
  5. Clutter
  6. Lack of physical activity
  7. Screens
  8. Dehydration
  9. Alcohol
  10. Stress
  11. Fear
  12. Hate
  13. Resentment
  14. Jealousy
  15. Overthinking
  16. Social media
  17. People pleasing
  18. Toxic environments
  19. Avoiding rest to stay productive
  20. One-sided relationships
Energy takers

Common energy givers

Energy givers
  1. Sunlight
  2. Nourishing foods
  3. Good sleep
  4. Fresh air
  5. Water
  6. Laughter
  7. Reading
  8. Vacations
  9. Music
  10. Loving family
  11. Balancing work and rest
  12. Shaping your life around your needs.
  13. Creating a supportive environment
  14. Practicing gratitude
  15. Supportive relationships



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