What Really Makes a Woman Attractive?

how to be more attractive

In our quest to figure out how to be more attractive, it’s easy to slip into thinking that beauty is all it takes. But let’s get real—true attractiveness goes far beyond a flawless complexion or an ideal physique. Sure, being physically attractive might open doors, but what keeps you in the room? Have you ever met someone stunningly beautiful who couldn’t hold down an engaging conversation? Or someone who might not grace the cover of a magazine but has an aura so captivating that you simply can’t pull yourself away?

This article is not going to offer quick fixes on how to be more attractive; there are already thousands of articles like those online. However, if you’re looking for deeper, meaningful attraction—the kind that not only gets you in the door but keeps you there long after the initial impression—then you’re in the right place. We’re diving into the heart of true attractiveness. It’s about being respected, cherished, appreciated, and more. So, if you’re ready to explore what it really means to be attractive in a way that lasts and impacts others profoundly, stick with me. Spoiler alert: becoming deeply attractive is entirely within your reach and doesn’t require a perfect body or face, but an engaging persona and an enriched spirit.

What Really Makes A Woman Attractive?

Many of us have been led to believe that attractiveness hinges on having a picturesque face and a model’s body. However, this notion is not only superficial—it’s downright harmful. It ties our self-worth to our appearance, which is precarious, especially as we age and our looks inevitably change. Basing our confidence and identity solely on what we look like means our self-esteem is as fragile as glass.

For example, if you’re looking for a romantic relationship, consider this: while your looks might draw someone’s initial interest, what will keep them by your side during your toughest days, when you don’t look so good? The allure of physical beauty alone is fleeting. True attractiveness that lasts and deeply resonates with others stems from who you are, not just what you look like.

Yes, I value my looks, but I yearn to be appreciated for more than just my appearance. I also seek recognition for my intellect, my hard work, my compassion, my perseverance, and my resilience. True attractiveness encompasses so much more than the physical—it’s about the depth of your character and the richness of your spirit.

It’s Time for a Change in Perspective

True attractiveness is holistic, empowering, and sustainable. It’s about being secure in who you are and taking care of yourself both physically and mentally. When you radiate confidence and self-assuredness, you become unstoppable—that’s the essence of true attractiveness. And trust me, it’s far more appealing than any physical trait could ever be. Don’t believe me?

Let’s start with a little story that changed my perspective on what truly defines attractiveness.  Yes, this is my opinion, but I’ll bet you have had similar experiences.

I remember meeting a woman at a conference who wouldn’t fit the traditional ‘cover girl’ mold according to magazine standards. Yet, there was something absolutely mesmerizing about her. She spoke with such confidence and passion, her eyes lighting up as she discussed her projects. It wasn’t her physical appearance that captured everyone’s attention—it was her vibrant spirit and infectious enthusiasm.

A similar revelation struck me during a breakfast outing with my first husband. Across the street, a slightly overweight woman stood. We never spoke to her, and I couldn’t pick her out of a lineup, yet her presence was unforgettable. She sparkled with a sort of unshakable confidence, standing as if she owned the world, head held high. Her assurance made her incredibly attractive. It was so impactful that even my ex-husband commented on this remarkable woman. These experiences taught me that true attractiveness comes from the spirit within—it’s the confidence and passion that truly draw people in.

You’ve probably had similar experiences, where it wasn’t someone’s appearance that drew you in, but something deeper—a radiance, a confidence, a passion.

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the caring she lovingly gives, the passion she shows, and the beauty of a woman only grows with passing years.

These words resonate because they speak to the idea that attractiveness comes from what you radiate from within. When your heart is full of love and passion, when you care deeply about people and the world, your true beauty shines through.

How to Embrace Your True Attractiveness

Invest in Your Mind and Interests

Finding an activity that you really love is super important for your personal growth and happiness. Choose something that’s not just recommended by someone else, but something that excites you and maybe even challenges you. This could be anything that lets you learn new things and build new skills. Simply scrolling on social media might be fun for a while, but it doesn’t really help you grow.

When you get really into a hobby that makes you think and learn, you become a more interesting person to talk to. For example, if you figure out how to fix your heartburn by changing what you eat, after doing lots of research about nutrition, that’s a story people will want to hear. Or if you decide to redo your old carpets and put in new wood floors all by yourself, that’s really cool and impressive. What grabs my interest might be different for you, but the main point is, when you learn and do things that challenge your brain, you become more interesting to others.

The more you dive into things you’re interested in, the more you know and the more experiences you have. This makes it easier to connect with different people and makes you more appealing to be around. People like talking to someone who can chat excitedly about different topics and share fun facts and stories. By getting into hobbies like these, you not only make your life richer, but you also draw people into your world, making room for great conversations and connections.

Care for Your Body

We all understand the importance of exercise, so I won’t dwell on that too much here. However, I do want to emphasize how vital it is to find a physical hobby. Engaging in activities like yoga, dancing, or hiking not only helps your body become more toned but also releases endorphins, which enhance your mood, and eliminates toxins, improving your overall health. This natural boost in mood and energy can significantly enhance your attractiveness. It’s not just about vanity; it’s about feeling good in your own skin and finding joy in movement. These activities not only keep you healthy but also radiate your inner vitality and well-being, making you feel—and appear—more vibrant and alive.

Nurture Your Spirit

The reason people who are attractive often seem to radiate a light and vibrant energy is because they’ve first filled themselves with positive energy derived from spiritual practices. Activities like mindfulness, meditation, and expressing gratitude are not just practices; they are pathways to becoming more grounded and centered.

When people invest time in these spiritual activities, they cultivate a sense of peace and contentment within themselves. This internal state of calm and balance is what we perceive as attractiveness—it’s an energy that feels both inviting and serene. Such practices also enhance self-awareness and emotional health, contributing to a more present, mindful demeanor that naturally attracts others.

Moreover, regular engagement in mindfulness and meditation can help reduce stress, leading to clearer skin, a brighter smile, and more relaxed body language—all key elements of physical attractiveness. By fostering gratitude, people often develop a positive outlook on life, which enhances their interactions and relationships, making them more appealing to others.

Ultimately, the attractiveness stemming from spiritual practices is about more than just external appearance; it’s about radiating the good energy that comes from a genuine connection with oneself and a deep appreciation for life. This kind of energy is infectious and draws others in, making it a powerful component of your overall charm and appeal.

Play and Enjoy Life

Attractiveness is magnified when you are seen enjoying life, so make sure to do things that you are passionate about and actually schedule them into your calendar. Feminine energy emphasizes playing and being, rather than merely planning and doing. Make it a regular practice to step out of your head and into your body, engaging in activities that bring you genuine joy. For me, that’s music. It puts me in a happy mental space; I feel the rhythm in my body and soul, and sometimes, I can’t help but move to the beat, even while sitting in a car. I may not be a great dancer, but that’s not the point. The goal is to allow yourself to let go and feel great while doing something you love.

When people see this, it enhances your attractiveness because you are radiating magnetic, positive energy that becomes contagious. And if it involves dancing, like it does for me, who cares if you’re not the best dancer? This is about you! It’s about honoring the things that bring you true joy.

It is incredibly attractive when someone knows who they are and embraces what makes them truly happy. This authenticity and joy not only fulfill you but also draw others to your vibrant energy.

Embrace Your Uniqueness

Think of someone you find incredibly attractive—and I’m not talking about their looks. Is this person like anyone else you know? Probably not, right? That’s because they know who they are and they own it. They are uniquely themselves. When we discover what we’re good at and fully embrace it, it significantly enhances our attractiveness. That unique sense of self and confidence in your abilities is what draws people to you. Being unique isn’t just about being different; it’s about being true to your own nature and expressing it without fear.

Deepen Your Self-Knowledge

Being attractive goes beyond surface-level traits; it’s about knowing your strengths and playing to them. It involves being interesting, kind, and aware of what you want and like. Dive deep into your personal journey to understand who you truly are. This self-awareness not only makes you more intriguing to others but also allows you to navigate life with greater confidence and purpose.

Prioritize Self-Care

Your physical well-being is reflected in your appearance and energy levels. Neglect like dehydration or lack of sleep can show in your skin and overall health. By taking care of your physical needs, you enhance your natural vibrancy and attractiveness. This doesn’t mean striving for perfection but rather ensuring you are well-rested, hydrated, and nourished.

Be Genuinely Interested in People

The art of attraction often lies in how you make others feel. Showing genuine interest in the lives of others and offering sincere compliments can make you immensely attractive. It reflects a spirit of generosity and attentiveness, which are highly appealing traits.

Be Your Authentic Self

Authenticity is magnetic. When you are true to yourself, you radiate a kind of confidence that is inherently attractive. This isn’t about putting on an act or trying to fit into a mold that others expect; it’s about embracing your true self, with all your quirks, passions, and imperfections.

People are naturally drawn to those who are genuine and honest in their self-expression. Authentic women do not waste energy pretending to be something they’re not, which frees them up to be fully present and engaging in their interactions. This authenticity creates a comfort zone around them, making others feel safe and understood, thus fostering deeper, more meaningful connections.

Also, when you are authentic, you align your actions with your true values and beliefs, which brings a consistent and reliable element to your relationships. People know what to expect from you, which builds trust and respect. Being genuine requires courage and vulnerability, and these are qualities that others deeply admire and are attracted to.

In a world where many people often wear masks, those who dare to be authentic stand out. They are the ones who inspire others, influence positively, and create a lasting impact. 

Have a Sense of Humor

Humor lightens your interactions and makes you more approachable and enjoyable to be around. It’s an important element in forming lasting, attractive impressions.

Be Kind and Empathetic

Kindness and empathy are powerful. Strive to be a person who others feel good around, avoiding judgmental comments and embracing a compassionate outlook. Your warmth will make you a beacon of attractiveness.

Look Your Best

Yes, grooming might seem superficial at first glance, but it’s important—not just for attracting people, but for how it makes you feel about yourself! Making an effort to look your best is a vital part of being attractive. It demonstrates respect for yourself and for those you interact with. Also, when you take the time to groom and present yourself well, it can significantly boost your self-confidence and positively influence how others perceive you.

It’s not just about vanity; it’s about presenting the best version of yourself in every situation. Good grooming habits demonstrate that you value yourself. So, while it might seem superficial at first, grooming is fundamentally about expressing who you are and showing how much you value yourself and those around you.

Stop Stressing

Just as a warm smile can draw people in, signs of stress can really push them away. Interestingly, a study conducted across Europe and South Africa found that women were more attracted to men who had lower levels of cortisol, which is the stress hormone. They also found these men more appealing when they appeared to have a strong immune system. What this suggests is that less stress doesn’t just feel better, it actually makes us look better, too!

When we manage to keep our stress levels in check, it’s not just our mood that benefits—our skin looks clearer, our eyes brighter, and our overall vibe more inviting. Reducing stress improves our health, which shines through as a kind of glow that makes us naturally more attractive. So, by taking steps to relax and unwind, we’re not only doing wonders for our wellbeing but also boosting how approachable and appealing we appear to others.

Smile More

Never underestimate the power of a smile. Smiling more not only makes you more approachable but also signals happiness and confidence, making you much more attractive. It’s a simple, powerful way to boost your allure.

By integrating these elements into your life, you not only enhance how you are perceived by others but also enrich your own life experience. True attractiveness comes from a well-rounded, vibrant lifestyle where you love and live fully. It’s about knowing yourself, caring for your physical and mental health, and connecting with others in meaningful ways. This is what makes a woman truly attractive—not just her appearance, but her lively spirit and loving heart.

From one friend to another

I met my husband at a party where, like all the other women, I was dressed up and looking my best. Initially, my appearance caught his eye, but it was our conversation that truly captured his interest. Shortly after we started talking, we plunged into a heated, hours-long debate about politics, revealing that we were on opposite ends of the political spectrum.

Although my looks might have drawn him in, it was my informed and strong opinions that really made me stand out. He wasn’t accustomed to being intellectually challenged in such a way, and this sparked his interest. My husband values intellect, and despite our fiery debates, he was intrigued enough to want to see me again. If I had been just another pretty face, I doubt he would have called. So yes, while I was looking cute and put together, that only started the conversation. It was ultimately my personality that kept him interested.

So, if you’re looking for a relationship, think about this: would you want a relationship based solely on your outward appearance, or one that values who you truly are at your core? True connection goes beyond the surface—it’s built on mutual respect, shared values, and genuine compatibility. This kind of relationship lasts and is more fulfilling because it’s rooted in more than just physical attraction.




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